This isn't a night I expected to come out here for but I'm glad I did. I'm looking forward to what's in store. I already got myself in the middle of a diva extravaganza as I walked in over the videotron.
Right now, everyone's in the middle of the lounge enjoying the kick off show....
BREA BELLA SCORED THE FIRST VICTORY OF THE EVENING, OFF OF 10 DIVAS ....
Oooh, Oooh Lita so hott I miss you, mami
May the best diva win tonight, the winner of tonight's Divas Championship will become the first recipient of the WWE Women's Championship....
See I knew there were always a reason I loved, Lita.... Thank you, mami!
The Women's Championship that's a real championship not to discredit the Divas Championship.
Bring in the Wild Somoans! I think its okay for the Usos to utilize that name and represent their heritage as they kick the Dudley Boyz ass.
USOS, BREAK OUT THE TABLES!
THE USOS DEFEATING THE DUDLEY BOYZ
YES, USOS! YES USOS! Of course, The Dudley Boyz are soar losers and hypocrites breaking out the tables. Its just too dam bad they felt the pieces of the fiber across their spines.
We have 10 minutes to start time to Wrestlemania 32....
One minute to go I wonder who's the first match.
Okay its about time. Wrestlemania 32 setting it off with Fifth Harmony performing "America The Beautiful".
Okay, first match of Wrestlemania the Intercontinental Ladder match. That's how you set off a pay per view. Following participants Dolph Ziggler, The Miz, Stardust, Sami Zayn, Sin Cara, Zack Ryder, and the champion Kevin Owens.
I haven't seen not one victory made as of yet. All I'm seeing are ladders being flown all around the ring. This match is so cutthroat, every man out for it. I don't want to say this, I want to be wrong. I want to have Kevin Owens walk out of here without the title over his shoulder. You know what would be awesome if Sin Cara manage to capture a victory. That'll be kool, having both Sin Cara and Kalisto caring titles in their team.
Zack Ryder picks up tonight's victory.
WOOOOOO WOOOOOO WOOOOOO WOOOOOO YOU KNOW IT!
MATCH #01 ZACK RYDER IS THE NEW, "INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION!"
Now, Rusty Jabbz I want y'all to repeat after me during this match.... "Y 2 JACKASS", "Y 2 JACKASS", "Y 2 JACKASS", "Y 2 JACKASS", "Y 2 JACKASS", "Y 2 JACKASS", "Y 2 JACKASS", "Y 2 JACKASS", LMAO ........
You could repeat that as many times as you want. I like doing that. Chris Jericho is an JACKASS!
My money is on Aj Styles. I could careless if Chris Jericho wins this match. This is his 13th Wrestlemania, Jericho has nothing to prove. Aj, this is your first night, show em how "PHENOMENAL!" you are.
Jericho your the only idiot I see inside the ring.
Don't tap Styles, don't!
Aj your letting me down. How you let Jericho kick out the "Styles clash".
For an old man, Y2J can really take a beating.
Oh shit, screw you Jericho your still a "Y 2 JACKASS" "Y 2 JACKASS" "Y 2 JACKASS" "Y 2 JACKASS" "Y 2 JACKASS" "Y 2 JACKASS" "Y 2 JACKASS"
MATCH #02 CHRIS JERICHO DEFEAT AJ STYLES
"DALLASSSS, DON'T BE SOUR!" THE NEW DAY ROCKS! THE NEW DAY ROCKS! THE NEW DAY ROCKS! THE NEW DAY ROCKS!
The New Day going toe to toe against The League of Nations for their tag team titles defending their 224 day reign. I admit there were a time I wasn't behind The New Day.
MATCH #03 THE LEAGUE OF NATIONS DEFEAT THE NEW DAY
Thanks to outside assistance from King Barrett
"Six man Tag Team Championship Match"
Shawn Michaels, Mick Foley, Steve Austin entering the ring and taking care of the League of Nations putting their heads to rest from Super kicks to Mr Sock to Stone Cold Stoners.
It's only fuckin 8:21pm this event is awesome, already... earleee
The New Day trying to get Stone Cold to jam with some booty o's
Steve Austin don't dance after a match. He throws back some BREW! You should know that Xavier, Sorry for the stoner, lol.
Okay, Rusty Jabbz we're about to take a journey. Follow me somewhere dark and deep into the dirty crevices of SUPLEX CITY....
SUPLEX CITY SUPLEX CITY SUPLEX CITY SUPLEX CITY SUPLEX CITY SUPLEX CITY SUPLEX CITY SUPLEX CITY SUPLEX CITY SUPLEX CITY
Dean Ambrose is a crazy son of a gun. He's going to kill himself during this match. Sad part he may not even get a victory. Watching this match, you can tell Ambrose was bullied a lot growing up in school. He has a lot of tricks up his sleeves. Here we go, Ambrose about to break out the Terry Funk chainsaw. Omg, that'll be fucked up if he uses it. Then again it is, Broc Lesnar I don't care. I want to see, Dean Ambrose break out the Mick Foley spiked bat. I wouldn't mind seeing him with that. Oh there it is, he got it out now. That was bullshit, of course Lesnar is going to win here tonight. Ambrose never got a chance to even use the spiked bat on him.
MATCH #04 BROC LESNAR DEFEAT DEAN AMBROSE
"NO HOLDS BARRED/ STREET FIGHT"
CONGRATULATIONS TO WWE HALL OF FAME, CLASS OF 2016:
The Godfather, Stan Hansen, The family of The Big Bossman, Jacqueline, The Fabulous Freebirds, Joan Lundan, Snoop Doggy Dogg, Sting
Wrestlemania looking good so far, it's about to get better. We're going into diva action like The Pope this is my best part of the show.
Each diva making an intrigue entrance into the arena.
The crowd up in here is for Sasha, I could feel that.
LET'S GO SASHA!, LET'S GO SASHA!, LET'S GO SASHA!, LET'S GO SASHA! BUT I'LL SETTLE FOR BECKY!
Good one, Becky take out the old man about time.
YES SASHA, BANK STATEMENT, MAKE YOUR STATEMENT TONIGHT GIRL.
THIS IS AWESOME, THIS IS AWESOME THIS IS AWESOME.... Oh I wish I was in the middle of that ring with them broads.
MATCH #05 CHARLOTTE DEFEAT SASHA BANKS & BECKY LYNCH
"TRIPLE THREAT DIVAS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH"
Charlotte, the new Women's Champion... Her, 197 days reign continue on
This match I have some interests. The Undertaker verses Shane O'Mac. Stipulation "MONDAY NIGHT RAW!" Need I type more.
Shane coming out with his WWE next generation his three boys dancing around at the start of the match. Shane could stay out there as long as he want and have all the fun he wants.
Don't worry about The Undertaker, dam man takes three hours to get his ass down that ramp.
The only question, I got to ask. Will Shane survive The Undertaker's yard?
Shane is taking a lot out of The Undertaker. He maybe able to pull this off. Which sucks if he does because I know there's a lot of you out there who don't want to see The Undertaker go, yet.
I don't know how legit this, Monday Night Raw takeover storyline is. Whatever it is, it seems Shane taking a beating for the return of his grandfather's company.
The Undertaker is out...
Shane's on top of Hell in the Cell.... Shane your wildin'
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
SHANE YOU FUCKIN' CRAZY, YOU COULD HAVE KILLED YOURSELF. Scaling off of an 27 foot high steel cage.
You put your body in harms way, only to go home with 0 results.
That was the dumbest thing I ever seen. Shane you came here seeking ownership of Monday Night Raw. Instead your leaving Wrestlemania out on a stretcher. And, I thought R-Truth was the stupid one in WWE, smh
MATCH #06 THE UNDERTAKER DEFEAT SHANE O'MAC
"HELL IN A CELL MATCH"
MATCH #07 WINNER OF ANDRE THE GIANT MEMORIAL BATTLE ROYAL, NXT COMPETITOR BARON CORBIN
Diamond Dallas Page, The Big Show, Kane, Shaquille O'Neal, Mark Henry, Damion Sandow, Goldust, R-Truth, Heath Slater, Tatanka, Darren Young, The Ascensions, Jack Swagger, Curtis Axel, Adam Rose, Bo Dallas, The Mongoose, Tyler Breeze, Baron Corbin
"ANDRE THE GIANT MEMORIAL BATTLE ROYAL"
FINALLY, THE ROCK HAVE COME BACK TO DALLAS....
Dallas have officially broken the attendance record of Wrestlemania 101,763
The Wyatt Family crashing in on The Rock's party. Seriously, guys y'all going to do the butterfly thing up in here. Yes, I get it y'all Bray Wyatt dickriders, lol. I was wondering where was The Wyatt Family.
The Rock got jokes, lmao
The Rock getting ready for The Wyatt's, right now
ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY, ROCKY
MATCH #08 THE ROCK PINNED ERICK ROWAN IN 06 SECONDS
John Cena lied everybody, he told us he wasn't participating in Wrestlemania this year. I knew he couldn't stay away.
JOHN CENA SUCKS, JOHN CENA SUCKS, JOHN CENA SUCKS, JOHN CENA SUCKS, JOHN CENA SUCKS, JOHN CENA SUCKS, JOHN CENA SUCKS, JOHN CENA SUCKS, JOHN CENA SUCKS,
MATCH #09 THE ROCK & JOHN CENA DEFEAT BRAY WYATT & BRAUN STROWMAN
Yes, we finally come to the end of the night. It's time for the main event. We're all getting ready for that ROMAN EMPIRE!
This match gonna be fuckin' crazy....
Six months of weight this man been carrying. Tonight is that moment of truth.
This was what I wanted, them to kill each other over tonight's world championship.
Stephanie with the constant interference.
Yes, Roman don't worry the bitch shouldn't have been in the way. Stephanie handing Triple H the sledgehammer.
LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN, LET'S GO ROMAN
MATCH #10 ROMAN REIGNS DEFEAT TRIPLE H
YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CONGRATULATIONS TO ROMAN REIGNS THE NEW WORLD CHAMPION WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
NEXT YEAR AT WRESTLEMANIA 33 WILL BE APRIL 02, 2017 LIVE IN ORLANDO, FLORIDA
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