RUSTY JABBZ NEWSLETTER JULY 2011 ISSUE # 04

RUSTY JABBZ NEWSLETTER

JULY 2011, ISSUE # 04

"I'M COMING OUT!"

Hello everyone this is, Jason Wright. Of course everyone knows me as Dj Handspin Dinero, dj, writer and ceo of Rusty Jabbz Entertainment Group. This particular newsletter issue is going to be different than anything I have written in the past.

As some of you may know already. My newsletter, normally focuses on hip hop, r n b, live performances and adult entertainment. I want to take a back seat to all of that today to discuss a topic with extreme interests involving myself. If you look up at the top of this newsletter you will notice I'm naming this particular issue, "I'm Coming Out!" Because that is exactly what I'm doing. I'm finally, coming out and making it known of my sexual orientation.

I probably have a few readers attention by now waiting to hear further. While others are probably saying, "Who cares?" You know what, if I receive a lot of responses with, "who cares". That would be a blessing to me for the simple fact that people like to make a big deal out of everything and over exaggerate your personal business. Before I go any further I would like to explain to my readers and viewers what sparked the reason for my coming out the closet.

It happened, yesterday when I did a pre-coming out day. I've been covering up my homosexuality, bi-sexuality since I was 8 years old that's right I said it, 8. Eight was the age, where a couple of friends of mine experienced on one another in our hallway incinerator. Since then I had an attraction to the same sex but don't get me wrong I still find women attractive. I dated, young girls and ladies in my past. They say you'll never forget your first. Well, it just so happen that my first was with a group of boys. I just never forgotten about my first sexual encounter. Even though I did an excellent job at covering up who I really am? Twenty-eight years of covering up, who I' am? My goal here was to keep my secret hidden till I die. I was going to take it to my grave. But I'm sick of hiding, sick of pretending, I'm just sick of being on the low and I wanted too release myself. Let's go back to where I began to speak on yesterday's event.

As I was mentioning earlier, I wanted to live a carefree life, the life of a homosexual. Just to see how they live and to see if I would like it or not. So I gotten myself, all groomed up clean shaved head, shaved face, shaved legs, lotion, body oil the whole works. I put on the sexiest pair of daisy dukes I could find along with an old 4X black P-Diddy Double Up T-shirt. So when I wear it, it looks like I'm wearing a skirt because the shirt is so long. It looks adorable on me. Once I gotten myself ready I went to Brighton Beach where I spent the majority of my day. Sure walking down the street I got a lot of negative steers and angry looks that's okay as long as you do not assault me, everything will be alright.

Everything was alright in that part of Brooklyn. It seems that certain areas people do not make a big deal over the appearance of gay's walking through there community. The most you'll get is dirty looks and talks about you behind your back. I' am cool with that in fact because of that response it made my stay in Brighton Beach feel special.

Coming back from Brighton Beach, I started to feel all that special fade once the Q train reached Newkirk. This is where I kind of complicated things and spoiled my special day. Once I got off at Newkirk I could have taken the B8 home but I wanted to walk home and walk in my side of town looking the way I look. You must keep in mind I live in Flatbush/ East Flastbush section of Brooklyn where its mainly ignorant and idle West Indians who are so anti-gay. Some would say, I was committing suicide by walking down the street dressed like that in my neighborhood. Maybe I was I didn't want to think about that I wanted to go about my day and head on home.

Then it happened, halfway home. I experienced my first day of gay bashing. I get approached and jumped by a mob of angry teenagers on Newkirk and Rogers. They didn't do me much harm, I guess because of my height they probably couldn't get me on the ground. They mostly gave me head shots to the back of my head. One of them, who I think was the ringleader bloody my lip. My wallet was stolen in the process. I spent the majority of last night and today canceling credit cards, debit cards, insurance cards, etc. I was so bent out of shape for the rest of the night. That attack just couldn't sit still with me. I started to ask myself, "Was it worth it?", "What am I trying to prove by coming out?" Then it dawned on me, what I'm writing right here this will make all those events and occurrences that happened to me worth it. I need to stop hiding, I need to stop running. I figure if I publish this story to my blog for everyone to now know the real me. Some change in my life will take an effect. To be honest I do not know, what to expect after I post this to my blog. I just know one thing, this secret finally needed to be released. I know, once this issue is posted I'm going to receive a lot of phone calls, maybe looking for answers to questions. I may lose a lot of friends and important contacts. I've been in denial all day the moment of truth is finally here.

I have written a lot and said a lot. I released, a lot of bones from my closet. By now, half of my contacts probably deleted me from their contact list. For those who are still with me, thank you and I will cherish your continued support.

Sincerely,

Jason Wright