Rusty Jabbz Newsletter March 2021 Issue #02 "Fastlane"

Okay, good evening everybody welcome to the Fastlane pay per view. WWE have alot of food layed out for the night. It doesn't mean everything is quite delicious. Come with me, let's see what's tasteful of the night. Going down this evening we have, Drew McIntyre vs Sheamus for the 100th time. These two love each other in the ring. One can only kick another person's behind for so long. Going down, we have the Nigerian Imposter Apollo Crews vs Big E for the Intercontinental Championship, worse Smackdown storyline and accent in history. I'm routing for Big E 100%. Apollo Crews ruined his class and his reputation.

Let's move on to some of the major matches that I have my eyes on for later in the pay per view. Matches like, Randy Orton vs Alexa Bliss, If you have been watching Monday Night Raw the past few weeks and what's been happening to Randy Orton. You only have to wonder what's on Randy's mind. Or will tonight perhaps be another night of Alexa Bliss getting over on Randy Orton. I don't want to see any of that. I want to see, the return of The Fiend!

The major two matches that everyone came out for, I would have more passion for them but let's face it. Who cares about it, Roman Reigns defeating Daniel Bryan for the Universal Championship, Edge the special enforcer will make sure that'll happen tonight and for the WWE Women's Tag Team Championship Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler defeating Sasha Banks and Bianca Bel Air. 🤭🤭🤭🤭 Those two matches aren't any big deal of the night. 

Fastlane Kick Off Show:

Booker T, Kayla, Peter Rosenberg, Jerry Lawler and Sonya Deville 

Kick Off Show Match #01 "UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP"

RIDDLE DEFEAT MUSTAFA ALI 

It look like Retribution is finally done with Mustafa Ali's bullying. 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿 Awesome, no more Retribution. 

MATCH #01 "WWE WOMEN'S TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP"

NIA JAX & SHAYNA BASZLER DEFEAT SASHA BANKS & BIANCA BEL AIR 

Sasha Banks blaming Bianca Bel Air for the loss. I believe Bianca received the message from the pimp slap, echoing the arena. It have been set for April 07th, Bianca Bel Air verses Sasha Banks at Wrestle Mania 37.

MATCH #02 "INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP"

BIG E  VS APOLLO CREWS 

Bullshit, what the fuck happened. The match have stopped. Apollo is all over Big E kicking his ass. Big E have retained his title. Why was the match stopped in the first place? 🤭

Some more bullshit, Shane going to have Elias take his place tonight, omg. Elias probably can't back out of it, The McMahon's will damage his internet record sales. You know how Elias feels about his music, lol. 

MATCH #03 

BRAUN STROWMAN DEFEAT ELIAS 🤭

Look like the hour is turning around with the Seth verse Nakamura. I was having my doubts about Fastlane. Seth Rollins maintain the victory. Shinsuke Nakamura fought a good fight. 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿

MATCH #04

SETH ROLLINS DEFEAT SHINSUKE NAKAMURA 

Seriously, Drew what's with the blue face paint coming to the ring. You look like a freaking smurf. If this is going to be your new look. You should fire whoever came up with it. 

This match is okay, probably only of the best things on so far tonight. I don't have anything against Drew McIntyre and Sheamus but when two people have been killing one another for twenty years its time to call a truce. 

MATCH #05

DREW MCINTYRE DEFEAT SHEAMUS 

Yes, Drew McIntyre defeated Sheamus again how many have that been I've lost count, smh. 

This is one of the matches I've mentioned earlier I wanted to see, Randy Orton verses Alexa Bliss. Alexa Bliss doing everything possible to frighten Randy Orton. Alexa trying to torch Randy, lol. Alexa trying to flatten Randy. She's having objects drop from the ceiling. OMG, this broad is crazy. All of this is only the prelude. Until that final moment when he arrives. 

He's here, The Fiend coming through the middle of the canvas. The Fiend returning with a brand new mask partly torched. 

MATCH #06 

RANDY ORTON VS ALEXA BLISS 

NO DECISION

Edge ended up destroying the match. This is how it all started with once again Jey Uso interfering during one of cousin's matches. There weren't no referee available. The referee have been taking out. Edge, basically tried his best to keep things in line throughout the match. Edge, later beaten both Roman and Daniel with a steel chair before he exited from his enforcer duties. Roman Reigns with a superman punch and pinfall on Daniel Bryan. 

MATCH #07 "UNIVERSAL CHAMPIONSHIP"

SPECIAL GUEST ENFORCER, EDGE 

ROMAN REIGNS DEFEAT DANIEL BRYAN 

Wow, tonight's pay per view. How do I feel about tonight's pay per view? If you want my honest opinion, 🤭 boring. I should of stayed home. I appreciate coming out tonight to Legends Bar. I had a great time. I always have a great time. Sometimes we don't know how or better yet the intentions of how bad WWE plans to air one of their pay per views. These are things we should know especially when dealing with the WWE. Tonight's pay per view was so bad. Only three out of eight matches were good this evening. Technically maybe two, considering the United States Championship match was on the Kick Off Show. Either way, it was only three matches that had your attention. Everything else was yawning. 🥱 

NEXT WWE EVENT 

WRESTLEMANIA 37 APRIL 07TH 

NXT TAKEOVER STAND & DELIVER APRIL 08TH

Rusty Jabbz Newsletter March 2021 Issue #01 "AEW Revolution"

Good evening, Rusty Jabbers. I know some of y'all weren't expecting me. Its good to be out here a year later in the midst of all that Covid-19 chaos. I'm getting ready to take part in for the night, AEW Revolution pay per view at Legend bar. I know I don't normally do to many coverages of AEW and Impact. Well, tonight will be my revolution. I'm apologizing to AEW for any neglect.

MATCH #01

THE YOUNGBUCKS DEFEAT MJF & CHRIS JERICHO 

Oh wow, I'm late. I just walked inside of Legend Bar, omg. I almost forgot which team I was routing for. #teamyoungbucks 

I'm sorry I missed the rest of the match. Regardless I'am proud of The Youngbucks for tonight's success 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿

MATCH #02 CASINO BATTLE ROYAL TAG TEAM 

QT MARSHALL & DUSTIN RHODES, DARK ORDER, SANTANA & ORTIZ, MATT & MIKE SYDAL, STU GRAYSON, BILLY GUNN & AUSTIN GUNN, PETER AVALON, THE VARSITY BLONDES, JURASSIC EXPRESS, THE BUTCHER & THE BLADE, PRIVATE PARTY, SCU, PAC, REY FENIX, JON SILVER & REYNOLDS 

Pac, Jon Silver, Rey Fenix and Jungleboy the last four participants remaining in the Casino Battle Royal.

Rey Fenix bringing it home for the team. Rey Fenix, the winner of the Casino Battle Royal.

Death Triangle will get the next AEW World Tag Team Championships opportunity at the Youngbucks. 

MATCH #03 "AEW WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP"

HIKARU SHIDA DEFEAT RYO MIZUNAMI

I'm starting to think Shida's matches are full of shit. No matter how much you whup her ass, she always manage to maintain gasoline in her tank. I don't care what anyone says, I know Ryo Mizunami is new to me but she did a hell of a job over Hikaru Shida. Of course, Shida always got to go home the winning champion. I'm getting sick of this. 🤭

AEW DOUBLE OR NOTHING MAY 30, 2021

MATCH #04 

MIRO & KIP SABIAN DEFEAT CHUCK TAYLOR & ORANGE CASSIDY 

Miro finally showed the real Rusev in the ring. Although it may have cost him his friendship between Kip Sabian. I don't know, we will have to find out on Wednesday's Dynamite. Miro putting Penelope Ford's life in hand during the match. 

MATCH #05 "THE BIG MONEY MATCH"

HANGMAN ADAM PAGE DEFEAT MATT HARDY 

I hear the people on TV routing loud and clear for Team Hardy. I wonder what side is Legend is on. You know I'm on Team Hangman, minus The Dark Order. 

The winner of tonight's ladder match will face Darby Allin on Wednesday's Dynamite.

MATCH #06 "LADDER MATCH" 

SCORPIO SKY DEFEAT MAX CASTER, LANCE ARCHER, CODY RHODES, PENTO EL ZERO, AND ETHAN PAGE 

So AEW fans aren't just rude. I found out tonight they have poor taste in hip hop music. I notice alot of AEW fans among me showing support to Max Caster horrible lyrics, smh. 🤭 Why I don't know. The ladder match is getting ready to begin. I notice a surprise visitor. Someone whom I've been wondering his lost since the karate man stick. Guess who's back! "ETHAN PAGE IS ALL ELITE!" 

It was an awesome match I say that. Congratulations to all the superstars in the ladder match. Congratulations to Scorpion Sky for winning tonight. Good luck on Dynamite Wednesday against Darby Allin.

Scorpio Sky will face Darby Allin for the TNT Championship this Wednesday on Dynamite 

The moment everyone been waiting for all week. "CHRISTIAN CAGE IS ALL ELITE!"

MATCH #07 STREET FIGHT 

STING & DARBY ALLIN DEFEAT RICKY STARKS & BRIAN CAGE 

Darby Allin, why do people care so much about him. A dufus on a skateboard with his face painted, oh thats cool. 🤭 LOL, I love the seesaw maneuver done by Hawk and Hubbs. Darby Allin being tossed through the window, lol classic 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿

Ricky Starks did a good job in his match up against Sting during the street fight and vice versa. Sting making an excellent come back going up against Rick Starks. I notice throughout the street fight the main focus were kept either on Sting vs Starks or Darby vs Cage. Sting was the one who managed to get pinfall on Ricky Starks. Brian Cage and Darby Allin later on in the night have been taken out of action. 

MATCH #08 "AEW CHAMPIONSHIP BARBED WIRE EXPLODING MATCH"

KENNY OMEGA DEFEAT JON MOXLEY 

OMG, LOL Can you imagine being surrounded in an area all decorated with exploding barbed wires. There's no safe area at all, the referee know it, he's out here covered in a disposable suit.

The smoke coming from the wires. Both, Moxley and Omega bathing in blood. Perhaps Moxley in more than Omega. Jon Moxley with the pin count. The Good Brothers and Don Callis getting involved. 

After the match, Jon Moxley being handcuffed in the middle of the ring. Kenny Omega and The Good Brothers beating down on Jon Moxley some more and threatening to leave him there for the remainder of the night surrounded around the explosion which they did. Which was bullshit. So, Eddie Kingston suppose to be a face now. He came out to the ring to cover Jon Moxley from all the barbed wire explosion.